Think about that... 12 times in less than 4 hours. 12 finger pokes. 12 new holes to harden the tip of his fingers. 12 drops of blood to fill 12 test strips.
I was subbing in a third grade class when the phone rang. "C" (our nurse) was asking if we had made any changes over the weekend. Justin had come to the clinic at 8:45 complaining of dizziness. Mind you, he just ate a half of a PB&J less than 30 minutes before. Not to mention his usual 50(ish) carb breakfast not long before that. Yet, he was "dizzy and glazed".
He was asked questions... but his "glazed" look over powered any answer he could drum up.
- "C" treated and retested 10 minutes later. Justin's BG level dropped more even after 2 tabs.
- 1 more tab and 5 more minutes... BG lower
- 17g and 10 more minutes... BG lower
- Juice and 15 minutes... were FINALLY moving in the right direction.
- He was sent back to class at 9:25 knowing that he would have his usual 10:15 check.
- 19c snack... plus popcorn party and 50 minutes later... low again.
- 2 tabs... 10 minutes later... STILL DROPPING!
That was his morning... the "easy" life of a diabetic right? No big deal?
I don't agree one bit. Because on this morning... the one that is reflected by the numbers on this paper below... show a child sitting in the nurses office while his friends were on the playground for recess. He is "dizzy", "glazed" and "unable to answer questions". He feels terrible... but he wishes more than anything that he could go out and play. The one time in the day his class would get a break from work... and he is sitting!
Not only that... but because he spent 1 hour and 35 minutes with the nurse within that 4 hour time period... he didn't get his work done. Meaning... extra homework! Fair? Not hardly!!
Notes from "C"...
This has been one of those weeks. You know... the angry, emotional, lost, numb and kinda bitter weeks. WHY? I don't know... full moon? PMS? diet is making me edgy? All possibilities I'm sure.
Have you ever felt as if you've lost yourself? Do you ever look in the mirror and wonder where you went? Is the girl that everyone referred to as "always happy and smiling" still in there hiding behind the dark baggy circles and sadness? Will she ever return?
I keep staring at myself... I have aged so much. I look WAY older than I am and no amount of makeup will hide the casualties of worry that have seized the girl I use to be.
I miss her... I miss her spirit... her spunk... her energy. I miss the optimism that has been replaced by skepticism.
Where's the girl that had no fear... because this one is drowning in it.
I want her back................. P.L.E.A.S.E.
Whoa!! Now that this post went WAY off track... I should probably wrap it up. If you made it this far... thanks and sorry. Thanks for being here and sorry I went off on a pity party. I think I need to eat some carbs or something :)
Good night all...