Monday, October 8, 2012

working with D

For today's post I decided to dig into my drafts; I started this one back in July. Not a whole lot has changed...

I spent many hours crying my way to work. Heartbroken that I couldn't be home where I was needed. Guilty that I wasn't visible at school like I had been for so long. Mad deep down. Feeling like I had let my kids down and myself down. Now before you tell me I am a good mom, I already know, maybe I just planned on the circumstances of my return to be different.

Working with D has taught me that I have to let go in many ways. I have to trust that others will be able to take care of him when I can't. I have had to rely, a lot, on Anthony to take phone calls and make decisions that I have always made. All of that is tough for a control freak such as myself.

Justin seems to take no interest in his own care. He understands  and he follows directions, but he would prefer you just do it for him. 

A boy thing? Lazy? Normal? Am I doing something wrong here?

And now...

Justin has seemed to survive my absence and now that I'm working from home it has been a bit easier. Anthony started texting me his lunch/snack numbers everyday which makes me feel like I am back in the "loop". 

I have found my sanity is much more stable when I'm on the inside. I plan on staying there .

Hope you have a fabulous Tuesday!!


No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...