From of the Mouth of yours truly...

-"Do you want some help with that or would you prefer to sit there and cuss about it a little longer?"

-"I prefer to talk to people on the phone; you can't make faces at people when they're standing in front of you".

-"You don't give me chills, your getting on my nerves and it's making me twitch".


-"That's kickin it back 80's style when we use to lay down on the bed to button our jeans".

-"You just use me to dispose of your pickle".


-"What, you a little out of touch with women's undergarment's?!?!"

-"Those six beers are kind of suckin ass right now, aren't they?"

From of the Mouth of Yours Truly...

Welcome to another round of "From the Mouth of Yours Truly". Here is a short little list of the things I may or may not have said lately...


-I don't think I know how to do 35mph?



-Who's driving this bucket?



-It's easy to appear like your being a smart ass when your dealing with a dumb ass.



-You call it Gray Hair... I call it "Stress Highlights"




-Why is it when something goes wrong you all automatically look at me???



-I can be the girl next door, or the bitch up the street... which one do you prefer?



-Suck it up Princess, this ain't your castle!



-Go right ahead and piss me off, but remember, what comes out of my mouth is your own fault.




-I can go from Halo to Horns in 2.6 seconds..maybe less.


-I'm kinda like that annoying itch you just can't scratch.



-The biggest mistake you can make is to under estimate my intelligence and tenacity.



-I'm not saying your dumb, but if we put your brain in a peanut shell, it would rattle like a BB in a boxcar!


-Sorry, don't believe I came equipped with a filter.


Think that's about it... whats come out of your mouth lately?

Five Question Friday...

To learn more about 5QF go HERE

WOAH! I haven't posted since last weeks 5QF. What's that about?? I even have a half way decent "From the Mouth of Yours Truly" sittin in the drafts.

Someones a s.l.a.c.k.e.r!!

Actually, I have a toothache that is kicking my a$$(<---for Meri). I think my wisdom tooth(that good ol' Dr. S said I had room for) is trying to squeeze it's way into its rightful place. DUDE! It huuurts to talk. SERIOUSLY! My family doesn't know what to do without my usual smarty pant ways around here.

Do you think this is payback for all the crap that comes out of my mouth?!?

Anywho... I guess I should get started before 5QF ends up being posted on Monday.


I'm not really sure how I am going to dirty up this 5QF with stripper shoes, Ho-creases or even poop, the questions are pretty clean, but I will give it a go.


1. Did you make any fun purchases this week?
I got some new shoes! Black ones!! Not super stripper high, but cute.



2. If you could go to any musical concert, what would it be?
My mind just blanked. Does Blue Man Group count as musical?


3. What is your least fav/ most fav house chore?
The dreaded L.A.U.N.D.R.Y!!!!! I can't stand it... I would rather scrub the toilet.

 4. Would you prefer new appliances or clothes?
I'll take a new pair of Miss Me jeans and some kick ass a$$ stripper shoes please.


5. Miracle Whip or Mayo?
Neither, unless I am slathering it in my hair, and then I'll take the mayo. Actually, I'm due for a good ol' stanky mayo hair treatment.

You should see me with my head all goopy with mayo and wrapped in Saran Wrap... it's HOT!

Now lets see what we have for the extras... 
Speaking of slackers... are you guys running out of questions?

Joanne asks... I have a tendency to hold grudges... how 'bout you???
"Grudge" may not be a strong enough word for what I hold. I can be spiteful... seriously spiteful!! I can refuse to speak to the hubby for days; drives him nuts and I LOVE IT! Don't mess with the queen bitch people. Just sayin!

Diane & Kelly stopped by to show some luv... be sure to stop by their blogs to do the same

Megan was a little unsure about my choice in swimsuits. I am all for whatever keeps the sand out.


Sarah says... I'm thinking Mabel just isn't a go for you!
Well, what is?? I need an alter to to blame some of this craziness on... a "Flo", a "Mabel" or even a "Cybil". How about "Lucy"? 

Miss Sky0138 and Lexi, my twin. I am SO glad that I can be your entertainment!



Laura???? I left you a special surprise on last weeks 5QF and you didn't stop by... what was that I was saying about holding grudges?!?

Just a little extra from Reyna. You've gotta love a girl who will shop for "ho shoes"(with her kids) for you and even video the journey. LOVE YA GIRL!!

 Looking forward to next weeks 5QF... I hope I have lots of questions to keep me busy. *she throws a "subtle" hint*

From the Mouth of Yours Truly...

NaBloPoMo... day 9

Its been a while, but I finally have a few things to share.
Here are some of the things that MAY or MAY NOT have come out of my mouth lately.

**This ones a little brutal... you have been warned!


-How about a little Stevie B... that might be a little bit more your speed.


-I'm currently experiencing technical difficulties... meaning I don't give a shit.


-Your talking a good game, HOWEVER, if you keep it up... the ONLY "ass" your gonna get, is when your finger rips through the toilet paper.


-You got that attitude and stubbornness from me... and FYI- I have WAY more experience so you might want to cut it out. 


-I'm always on my best behavior... its just that my best behavior isn't very good.


-Never underestimate the power of a hissy fit.


-I still have accident forgiveness so don't think I wont run you over.


-Every conversation is more fun if you start with a dirty mind


-He also eats underwear, so I'm not sure I would take that as a compliment.

What's come out of your mouth lately?

From the Mouth of Yours Truly...

After all the gloom... I though I needed to post a little fun :)

Welcome to another round of "from the mouth of yours truly". Here is a short little list of the things I may or may not have said lately...




-If you do it... you better hope you can out run me... just sayin.



-He still has all his teeth... so that a bonus.




-Is your brain actually listening to what your mouth is saying?




-At least when you're not tan you don't look like the guy from Powder.

- If I didn't love you so much I would spray you with this fucking water.


-Didn't you know? I've been diagnosed with awesomeness. But don't worry... its not contagious.


- I hear voices and they don't like you.


- I stopped to think and then I forgot to start again :/


- I am experiencing life at the rate of several WTF's a minute.


What's come out of your mouth lately??

From the mouth of yours truly...

-I use to rock it with my tight rolls and my Members Only jacket.


-You've gotta kick it out wide and work the hips.


-This here is the "butterfly"... only white girl style :/


-You lay pipe like nobodies biz-ness.


-I think the grill just took off half of my eyebrows


-Your like the nugget that wont come off the dogs ass


-I'm thinking that gaining weight is not helpful when wearing stripper shoes.


-You don't give me chills... its more like a tic because you stress me out.


-You have officially lost all your pancreatic decision making rights.


-I think the Lollipop in my mouth will last longer than that will.


That's all I have for now... what have YOU said lately?

From the mouth of yours truly...

Its THAT time again!!!

Time for another addition of those silly things that I MAY or MAY NOT have said...

 -There is something wrong with you; which is EXACTLY why were such good friends.

   

-Ready to rise OR shine... pick ONE because I can't do both.

-It's okay that I'm not skinny... chubby people are harder to kidnap.

-So what if I'm the fruit loop in the bowl of cherries... you'd be so bored without me.

-CLEARLY I am cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.

-Apparently common sense isn't so common.

-Just wait... my middle finger is thinking about its reply.

-You are seriously going to make me choke on my rabbit turd ice. 
What's come out of YOUR mouth lately  

From the mouth of yours truly..

I've been feeling a little... um... blah lately. So I figured I would give it a good attempt to lighten the mood a smidge with another post of those silly things that MAY or MAY NOT slip out of my mouth.


- "PUMPKIN!! Grab the 4 wheelers... we can go mudding in the front yard".


-"Did that guy just have boobs?"



-"YOUR son is in the shower using his "business" as a gun".


-"Should I spread em?"


-"Have you ever seen my afro... it's not pretty".


-"Now all we need to do is throw a little rock down and we'll go all Sun-city on em".


-"I don't think banana laffy taffy's qualify as potassium".


-"it took me over 30 yrs to get this good at being sarcastic".


-"Just because I smile at you doesn't mean the thoughts in my mind aren't damaging".


-"Anything is possible with some duck tape and tie straps".

-"Ya know... this is one of those weeks when drinking all my diet coke is gonna get you beat down".

-"I am going to be nice today... it will be hard, but I will give it my best".

-"This is just about as pointless as a white crayon".

-"It took me a long time to loose my mind... what in the world would make you think that I would want a piece of yours"?

-"I don't want to brag or make anybody jealous, but I can still fit into the earrings that I wore in high school".

Until next time...

From the mouth of yours truly...

Welcome to another round of "from the mouth of yours truly".
HMMM~ lets see what hullaballoo has flown out of my lips recently...


- I wish that kid would get his finger out of his nose... it's kinda making me nauseous.


- (to go with the above) What do you think he's gonna do with it when he gets it?


- I need to wash my jeans, but I'm scared to because if they shrink... I'M SCREWED!


- I need to get some sun on these glow sticks I call legs.


- It's call Juvenile Diabetes... NOT Sugar Diabetes... Sugar DIDN'T cause this! (and yes, there WAS a bit of an attitude)


- OMG! There's a spell check on my Google bar! When did that get there? HOLLA!!


- I just looked down and realized this outfit makes me look like a bumble bee.


- I signed up for pump class... the girls are gonna be so proud!


This is a little bonus from the mouth of the hubby... in conversation with his boss.
- I just TELL my wife I'm doing it... WATCH THIS... (phone rings). Um honey(in his sweet voice)... Do you mind if I go to Texas?


What's come out of your mouth this week??

From the mouth of yours truly...

Welcome to another round of "from the mouth of yours truly". Here is a short little list of the things I may or may not have said lately...


- Do you want to be like the kid at McDonald's that CAN'T count back change?


- Do you think maybe you should be on medication for that?


- Good job baby... you just taught the new guy how to sit around on his ass all day.


-There are not enough middle fingers in the world to say how I feel about that.


- Don't try to over think it... your brain might start smokin!!!


- Whoever told you to be yourself doesn't know you very well do they?


- If you could read my mind you would need therapy!!


- That sounds like the making of a new rap song to me!!


- Why? If I stick them up your ass are you going to work faster?


- Just get 2 Diet Vanilla Cokes and stop arguing with me!!!!


- I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU AND YOUR NOT LISTENING!!! (my husband always says this to me. It's like a running joke at our house. So this morning when I had the chance to say it to him... I was more than happy to :)


- I'm loosing brain cells dealing with you people.


So what's come out of your mouth lately???